A little story from my mate Jimbo, which is fast gaining status as an urban myth:
"Spoke to bloke I know that works on a local radio show in Glasgow.
Pie-loving Pop Idol winner Michelle McManus was in a while back doing some live songs. They had a phone-in to nominate a Beatles song for her to sing.
I am the walrus.
They wimped out and got her to sing something soppy instead."
I don't believe a word of it.
Meanwhile, over on my other blog Robber Rabbit, Secret Agent James Bond 007 talks about his kinky fetish of wanking into hats; followed by a full and frank discussion of the art of millinary masturbation, which we are assured is the "new black", or something.
Next week: Royal floozie Camilla Parker-Bowles on pretending you've got Tourette's Syndrome while in polite company.