More Comic Sans Criminals Exposed

"Second floor. Going down. Door closing," droned the Mogadon-voiced lift in our local shopping centre as I made my way to Waitrose. But already, my attention had been grabbed by something else.

The lift walls are plastered with advertisements for local services, and one of these claims to be from (and I quote), "the local leaders in computer tuition". They will, the advert claims, turn the most frightened beginner into a confident (and I expect, silver) surfer "within a matter of weeks".

If that is the case, why is your advert ENTIRELY IN COMIC SANS (The Font of Champions)?

I note their name (which I will not divulge here, for I am not in the business of wrecking businesses), for I wish to make further investigations. And damn good thing I did. For not only is their entire website also in Comic Sans, The Font of Champions, but their search engine metadata reads something along the lines of "Add some text here which will show up on search engine results".

As a result, Googling [Name of Champion Company] returns the confident business-winning phrase "Add some text here which will show up on search engine results".

I have a mind to send them a bucket of killer wasps in the post. No court in the land would convict.