Lost in the health supermarket

To Aldershot's massive new health centre, built much on much the same lines as a shopping mall with a multi-storey car park and huge central atrium with reception areas around the side like shops.

Following mysteriously disappearing signs for the toilets, I find myself lost in the twisting corridors below stairs until I am accosted by some chap in a security guard uniform.

"Can I help you, sir?"

"I'm trying to find the Gregg's."
 
"The what, sir?"

"Gregg's. Gregg's the Bakers. I'm famished."

"Ah."

"Or the Starbucks. Surely this place has a Starbucks."

"I'm afraid this isn't a shopping centre, sir. What are you really after?"

"Eye tests."

"Very funny, sir. Now get out."

I got out.