WHERE'S MY FREE SPECIAL K?
And this ain't the first time either. I'm still waiting for my free carton of fruit juice from three months ago.
That – my friends – is the very definition of Middle Class Angst.
And you know that somewhere there's some light-fingered ne'er-do-well necking your free carton of cranberry juice, munching on your free Special K straight out of the box, feeding the free cereal bar to their dog-onna-string and you know deep down that you want to rip out their lungs, fill them with helium and give them to a small child as a toy.
But I shall do nothing of the sort. I will just sit on the doorstep, eyeing the limp, empty paper bag, rocking back-and-forth and railing against the world over my lost breakfast cereal that I don't even like.
Here ends today's lesson on the cruel nature of the human condition.
UPDATE: A happy ending! Kellogg's saw this post and have arranged vouchers. Hooray!
What's really humiliating though, is when you leave out a bag of clothes for the Sally army and the tramps come and see what you wear then out of pity leave you their clothes.
ReplyDeleteScary, I hate not getting free stuff. Why don't they just leave the free stuff on your doorstep instead of a paper bag..?
ReplyDeleteThat way, if said free stuff is nicked, you are non the wiser. Should it be there when you get home... hey presto! Free stuff.
And it would save them costs of A: Employing people to leave paper bags on your doorstep, and B: The actual costs of said paper bag and printing costs, plus various peripheries.
Job done.
Actually, it turns your front door step into an advertising billboard
ReplyDeleteI've got plenty of boxes. Is there a box shortage in some places?
ReplyDeleteHold on... you get a bag pushed through your letterbox, which you then have to put back outside, and then they come back and fill up the bag they delivered the day before?
ReplyDeleteSeems like a lot of extra work for them (I suppose it saves on actual sample product, but then they're not delivering samples to people who don't know they they will like the product, only to people who presumably already know and want and probably buy it, so it seems like a false economy, and misses the point of handing out samples).
First I've heard of this. If I get free stuff delivered, and it happens rarely, it's always a sample-size pack pushed through the letterbox or left outside.
Nice plan Scary. I see from your update that it worked. Be a bit more adventurous and see if you can free cuppas.
ReplyDeleteSomebody has started a Food Bank in this area (Salvation Army?) to help the poor who are struggling to heat and eat.
ReplyDeleteI found a polythene bag on my doorstep a few weeks ago asking for tinned and packeted food donations It said "soup, beans, meals etc welcomed. Please do not give tinned food containing ham, pork, bacon or sausages". So I put two tins of Morrisons fish flavoured cat food in the bag. . . . They took it!
They just did exactly the same thing down our street. It's now 21:15 and the bags still on my door step and still empty. No doubt someone, somewhere is selling a lot of special K on ebay.
ReplyDeleteSome scam!