On mis-prints

On mis-prints

"Waiter"

"Yes sir - is everything alright with your starters?"

"Well... no. It's the starter I wanted to talk about."

"Ah yes. Prawn toast and seaweed."

"Yes, although the seaweed's against my better judgement because you can just pick it up off the beach...."

"...just like chef..."

"Wait... what? No... wait. It just tastes funny."

"That, sir, is chef's speciality sauce."

"Yes, I see. The sweet and chilli sauce."

"No. Sweat and chill. Chef's special."

"But surely you mean..."

"I don't know what you're complaining about. Chef's a very clean man. He have regular medical - every four, five years. We haven't poisoned anyone for weeks."

"But... but..."

"He takes extra care over his sweat an' chill sauce, too. He only makes it after he takes plenty of exercise, which is commendable seeing as he weighs twenty stone. He tells me Mrs Chef kept him up half the night. Mrs Chef can raise a sweat at twenty paces, I can tell you for nothing, sir."

"Umm.. right. And what about the 'chill' part?"

"Sorry. That a mis-print. It should say 'rat poison'."


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