On coming to terms as life as LOBSTERMAN, defender of the Queen's Peace

On coming to terms as life as LOBSTERMAN, defender of the Queen's Peace

In which one man's crusade against crime hits the buffers.

"Dad?"

"What is it son?"

"I... I don't want to be Crab Boy any more."

"I beg your pardon?"

"I don't want to be your superhero sidekick. It was fun to begin with, but now you're making me wear the costume to school and everyone takes the mickey. Even the teachers are laughing."

"But son - being a superhero's sidekick is a noble calling. You must rise above it. Be one with the lobster. And get me a list of these so-called teachers. They must face CRAB JUSTICE."

"And mum says you've got to grow up."

"Right. Err... right. Tell her there's plenty of space at low water mark for her to be tied to a post and left for the crabs, just like the rest of the law breakers that have afflicted this town with their bad haircuts and crossing the road from behind parked cars. Crab Justice cannot be denied."

"You tell her. I'm off to play Call of Duty."

Kids, eh?

Small Ads: For Sale - Lobster costume, slightly stained. Offers.