On understanding the metric system

On understanding the metric system

Sahara asked me - after I mentioned the conversion rate of the metric shitload to the Imperial Shedload - about units of measure. So, for those of you still working things out on the old money, always happy to oblige:

One metric shitload = 2.71 Imperial Shedloads

1 Imperial Shedload = 0.03 Fucktonnes

1 Fucktonne = 1.02 Fucktons = 23.567 Metric spunkbubbles

2 Bloody great handfuls = 3 Metric jubblies

3 Metric jubblies = 1 good old fashioned slap round the face = 0.47 Had it up to heres = 0.02 Motorboats

6 inches = 1 standard handjob = 0.5 Milibands

2 standard handjobs = 1 "Last night I dreamed I was skiing" = 0.5 Metric Liars

12 pints British ale = 56.8 litres of French piss = 1 vomir dans une haie = 0.93 Imperial Sick inna Hedge = 0.69 US Chunders

Do let me know if I've missed anything.