HOMEOPATHIC JAMES BOND

The Homeopathic James Bond Gag What I Wrote

Homeopathic secret agent James Bond walks into a bar after a hard day killing Her Majesty's enemies completely TO DEATH.

"Good evening, sir" says the attractive young woman behind the bar, already slipping out of her clothes in damp anticipation, "My name's Randy. Randy Orgasms. How may I be of... service?"

Bond raises an eyebrow, used to such forward behaviour from the female of the species in his long, hard years in the Service. But tonight, he is on duty, evil is at large in this very establishment.

"I'll have a homeopathic Vodka Martini, if you would be so kind."

"How, " she asks, her voice laden with innuendo, "would sir like it?"

"Diluted, shaken but not stirred, diluted, shaken but not stirred, diluted, shaken but not stirred, diluted, shaken but not stirred, diluted, shaken but not stirred, diluted, shaken but not stirred, diluted, shaken but not stirred, diluted, shaken but not stirred, diluted, shaken but not stirred, diluted, shaken but not stirred, diluted, shaken but not stirred, diluted, shaken but not stirred, diluted, shaken but not stirred, diluted, shaken but not stirred, diluted, shaken but not stirred, please."

Bond slept alone.