Wednesday, November 25, 2015

Introducing the "Acme" Dog Spigot

Have a dog? Struggle with grooming and access during routine dog inspections? The you need the "Acme" Dog Spigot.


Features include:

* 360-degree rotation in all axes for thorough inspection and grooming

* Motorised version to allow all-round exhibition at dog shows, in your front window etc

* Fully lubricated bum spike

* Meat-flavoured nose-clamp

* Sturdy construction, but packs flat to suit any household

* Cow version available for safe grooming and inspection of cows and other bovine-style fauna

* Allow 28 days for delivery

* £250, comes with a free inflatable Barbara Woodhouse with functioning orifices

* Strictly no refunds

I am not mad.
at

5 comments:

  1. Gonzoland6:32 pm

    Does it include dog or is the picture a 'Serving Suggestion"?

    ReplyDelete
  2. Anonymous9:24 pm

    You are mad. The end.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Dioclese5:57 pm

    I want one for Christmas - except I don't have a dog.

    Does it work with sheep please?

    ReplyDelete
  4. Flaxen Saxon1:15 am

    Better make sure the pointy bits are well oiled or you will end up with a dog's arse reamer. Arse.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Robin of Locksley9:32 am

    Tell the designer chappie that it's fine for short, stiff dogs but needs some form of underfoot support for anything larger.

    ReplyDelete