Wednesday, June 30, 2004

Chuffed, and a confession

Chuffed

A Daily Mail editorial entitled "Better Trains" talks of the man in charge of the railways pledging a massive 405 million pounds on the network in order to bring it up to the standards of those on the continent. "We've had the best network in the world, and we'll have it again," said a man obviously toadying his way to the top. "Our trains must be faster and cleaner; our stations brighter and the service better. The public should expect results from such a lump of money."

All well and good, except the man in question is Sir Brian Robertson, president of the national transportation commission, speaking in November 1954; reproduced in a newspaper found under the lino in my bathroom.

In other news, four Palestinians killed in clashes in Jerusalem.

Plus ca change....

You heard the man

"Hyperlinking to this site is not permitted without the express prior permission of Sellotape." Oops.

Confessional

My recent piece on *cough* a friend's *cough* admiration of Velma from Scooby Doo leads me to ask the question: Which TV characters or presenters did you fancy as a kid? Has the experience left you scarred even today?

I will confess to three, all with devastating consequences for my sanity.

1. Janet Ellis - It was those jumpsuits and leotards on Grange Hill that set those teenage hormones racing. Blue Peter was just the Brucey Bonus. It's rather disturbing that she's still presenting today, having not aged a bit, with a daughter who has a head that looks like a cardboard box. I also know for a fact that there are people even more obsessed with her now than I ever was.

2. Paula Ann Bland - Played Claire in Grange Hill. She looked exactly like M****** P****** in my English class, the object of several years of unrequited teenage lust. Appeared topless in the News of the Screws as soon as the work dried up, which rather spoiled things for the purist. Now working in a shoe shop.

3. Sue Nicholls - or rather, Nadia Popov from Rentaghost. I watched each week in rapt delight, just to see the Soviet sneezing spook, with parts twitching which I hardly knew existed. She's now Audrey Roberts in Coronation Street, which I daren't watch in case I embarrass myself.

Your turn - speak your filthy brains.

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