Wednesday, June 19, 2013

In which my mind is utterly blown

Perusing the news agencies in the line of duty, I find that the United Nations Office for Outer Space Affairs is An Actual Thing.

Mind. Blown.

Granted, they are an actual thing that doesn't seem to do many actual things, but they keep diplomats off the streets of Vienna, in meetings passing resolutions and stuff when they could be out creating mischief.

If that wasn't enough, my pal Quarsan goes further to tell me that the UNESCO Astronomy and World Heritage Initiative is also An Actual Thing, going through all the bureaucratic things necessary to have the moon landings declared heritage sites.

These heritage sites, Andy tells me, include the detritus of the first manned landing in 1969, which includes "a bag of urine, a bag of poo, and Richard Nixon's autograph".

Mind. Blown. Again.

And with poo containing of shed intestinal matter, future scientists can go to the moon, collect a sample, and clone poor, dead Neil Armstrong.

Mind. Blown. Again. Again.

Of course, this neatly solves the eternal problem of what to do with unwanted bags of dog crap that litter parks and woodland all over our green and pleasant land.

Scoop them all up, shove them in a rocket ship, and heave them off to the moon. Let those pencil-necked geeks at the United Nations Office for Outer Space Affairs sort it all out.

3 comments:

Gonzoland said...

Also, there's the International Space University where you can become a Space Executive Master of Business Administration.
Far too 'B Ark' for me.

Dioclese said...

So basically dog owners have to clear up the poo, but it's OK to leave it on the moon?

Imo Emah said...

I can't even.