The Rio 2016 website reminds us that the next summer games are only two years away. It also shows us this picture, which illustrates – very wrongly – what they think BMX riding might be.
If the carry on their preparations in this manner, one or two athletes might be in for a shock when they turn up for their events.
And herein lies my big plan to make the Olympics – both summer and winter – exactly 253% more fun.
- Everybody qualifies for the games in their own sports as normal
- They turn up in Rio fully trained and with all their kit ready to go
- Their name is drawn out of the hat, and they are assigned a random sport in which to compete
- PROFIT! (Also: TOP COMEDY)
Can you imagine?
A weightlifter sinking to the bottom of the pool during the synchro swimming
Boxers forced to wear full kit for the table tennis
The weeds from the clay shooting forced to run the marathon (at the point of their own guns in necessary)
Hammer throwers doing that thing with the ribbons and the hoops in the rhythmic gymnastics
Absolutely anybody who doesn't do ski jumping doing the ski jumping
Lord Coe should get on the blower and bring the whole thing back to London where it belongs. We've done a reasonably successful games – now watch as we mess it up in supreme style.