|R2-D2 grew to hate his part-time job|
1. Greece gave the world great poets, philosophers and writers such as Socrates, Herodotus and Sappho. In recent years, they seem to have lost their way a bit. As such, Greece only has two kinds of popular music. Greek pop music, which is awful and should be destroyed with fire and sticks; and classic soft rock, which gnaws at your psyche like a stalky, gnawing thing as you start to worry that you haven't heard Extreme's "More Than Words" for a couple of hours and it's due another airing. Classic soft rock should also be destroyed with fire and sticks.
2. Greece also gave the world great thinkers such as Archimedes, Hero of Alexandria and whoever came up with the bright idea of a giant horse on wheels as a device to win a war. In recent years, you could say they've lost their way a bit on the whole-thinking-things-through-in-the-bath thing as well. How, then, could you explain the modern Greek sewer system that means it cannot cope with anything larger than the average turd, meaning you've got to wipe your bottom and put the paper in a poo bucket.
I repeat: The birthplace of civilisation makes you wipe your bum and PUT IT IN A POO BUCKET.
However, Greece makes up for this awful shortfall by having Ouzo, so you're too drunk to be disgusted by having to wipe your bottom and put it in a poo bucket. The worst thing you can do, though, is kick over the poo bucket when drunk, so it's swings and roundabouts.
Apart from these minor gripes: GREECE, everybody, let's hear it for Greece!