Wednesday, January 28, 2009

On mail order scams

On mail order scams

The acceptable face of SpamI recently got a spam email with the stright-to-the-point subject line: "Keep her moaning all night and all day"


Intrigued by the offer of foolproof penis enlargement pills and the 24/7 shagging power that goes with them - with absolutely no fatal and/or elephantine side-effects GUARANTEED - I fired up my credit card and made three easy payments of £299.99 for their information pack.

"Order today and get a FREE 'Get a huge cock now - Ask me how' T-shirt". How - I ask - could a man resist?

Allowing the standard 28 days for delivery, a scruffy mail order package soon fell into my sweaty hands. There, in equally scruffy hundred-times-photocopied print it repeated its tantalising promise:

"Keep her moaning all night and all day. SEE INSIDE!"

As I ripped it open, a small card fell out. Printed on it were two words:

"Marry her"


On being a bit of a media whore

Last night saw my participation in the legendary Angry and Cliff podcast, in which we talked about me, my weblog and my plans to invade Iceland while their guard is down. And then a bit more me, me, me.

It is HERE. You'll like it. It's got me in it.

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