THE HOLIDAY TAT SHOP OF DR MOREAU

Man alive, I love holiday tat shops, especially at the end of the season when all that's left is the unsellable items which have been sitting, fading on the shelf since about 2005, hoping that somebody will pass looking to complete their Beyblade collection, or are after a doll with poor standards of spelling. 

Then there's this monstrosity:

Flashback to the Guangdong Lucky Toy and Rocket Fuel Concern, eight years ago. The production line is at a halt and a panicked supervisor explains all to the boss...

"We've got a shitload of dolls' bodies but no heads, boss. Damn head supplier's let us down again."

"What else have we got?"

"There's 20,000 assorted dogs' heads but I don't think ..."

"Do it"

"But the kiddiewinks - they'll have nightmares. It's like something from The Island of Doctor Moreau. We can 't possibly..."

"JUST DO IT!"

"Don't come running to me when somebody takes the piss out of them on the internet."

"DO. IT."