Saturday, November 09, 2002


I did A Very Bad Thing on the train to work. I was busting for a piss, so breaking the habit of a lifetime, I was forced to use the on-board toilet. It was a primitive thing, just one step removed from a hole in the ground, and appeared to have been previously occupied by an IRA "dirty protest."

In the process of draining my onions (no mean feat on a train, I can tell you) I noticed a sign which read "Do not flush the toilet while the train is in station", a sign just crying out for a slight amendment. Taking the pen out of the notebook I routinely carry around for the benfit of you lucky people, and making sure there were no hidden cameras or highly paid midgets spying on me, I added two words.

"Except Basingstoke."

This is the town that gave the world Elizabeth Hurley. I thought it was time the world gave something back.

Back to Scaryduck

No comments: