The Prince "Plunger" Windsor Memorial Vote-o
I suppose, falling out of bed at ten o'clock this morning to find that Prince Charles is to marry a horse, that we ought to take time out to pay tribute to that special place in our hearts taken by our very own Royal Family. The bunch of bastards.
So, let me be the first to say of the forthcoming wedding between the heir to the throne and the winner of the 1977 Grand National: Do we get the day off work?
Your votes, please, for the following Scary Stories:
* Haunted Holiday - So, I met Prince Charles the other day
* Underneath the Arches - And I asked him about his main squeeze, Mrs Parker-Bowles
* Cubs' Camp - "Sir," I said, "How's Camilla?"
* Scatalogical Manouevres in the Dark - He looked at me quizically, before grinning like Fred West
* Maurice the Mangler - "Really firm and fruity, how about your's?"
The dirty old man, I'd vote him for King. Vote-me-do!