Sunday, November 10, 2013

The Illustrated Encyclopedia of the Bleedin' Obvious

The Beatles: Were quite cool in their day

We are indebted to value-price clothing retailer Primark for publishing a handy, content-free guide to the bands that appear on the retro T-shirts in their stores.

Now, in case you had never heard of The Beatles, you'll learn that "They’re the best selling band of all time in the US. How cool is that!"; and that Fleetwood Mac are sometimes called (by nobody, ever) "The Macs".

Thanks for that, Primark.

Hopefully, they'll now follow that up with a further series of breathless posts on other stuff that their customers really ought to know, but don't.

JESUS CHRIST
Born: Christmas!
The look: Hippy chic, socks and sandals
Fun Fact: Died, but came back to life! Coolio!!

ELVIS
The look: Jumpsuits, dead on the toilet
Fun Fact: Known as the King of Rock'n'Roll, even though he wasn't an ACTUAL King!!

BREATHING
How to do it: In... out... easy now... in... out...
Fun Fact: If you stop breathing, you'll die! Deffo NOT cool!!!
THE THEORY OF RELATIVITY
Discovered by: Albert Einstein
The look: Big hair
Fun Fact: Measurements of various quantities are relative to the velocities of observers, meaning space and time can dilate, particularly around strong gravity fields. However, the speed of light remains nonetheless invariant, the same for all observers.WOWSERS!!!


I'm more of a TK Maxx person these days.

4 comments:

Amy Selwyn said...

LOVE this. It is hilarious.

Wilhelm 64 said...

What's that parked on the left? A Beetle.
Fun Fact: The VW Beetle was invented by Adolf Hitler for his hippy children, Dweezle and Bilbo.

Alistair Coleman said...

Thanks Amy!

Keith said...

I don't believe in "THE THEORY OF RELATIVES".

They do F all for me, and I do F all for them! That is a nice simple equation isn't it? Einstein's got nothing on me.