In which your author gets his dog to review dog food - Brown's Pet Range

Dog verdict: Yum

You probably now by now that I will accept just about any offer to review a product on these pages if I thought a) the product worthwhile, b) if there was a free sample. While other bloggers prefer to keep their pages free from advertising and what-not, in the fear that it would somehow sully the purity of their writing, I have no such qualms because - frankly - my website, my rules.

Also, I'm reading a very entertaining book right now for review, kostenlos. So there.

So, would I - for example - accept an offer for a sample of dog food in exchange for an honest review? Damn right I will, for I have a 12-year-old dog who is as fussy about what goes into his face-hole as any other canine. Hello, then, Brown's Pet Range. And here I was expecting a tiny sachet as a sample, but got a box the size of a small moon. Here's a company that knows how to get on the right side of a reviewer.

Except I'm not the reviewer. He's small, black, white and grey and a fussy eater. In fact, a typical meal-time for Wilson is to watch you put his bowl down in the kitchen, signal that he has noted your effort, and will then ignore it until he is starving enough to demean himself to eating dog food.

Not so this Brown's stuff.

1. Dog bowl on kitchen floor
2. Black, white and grey blur enters kitchen
3. Loud chomping noises
4. "More please"
5. Outside to woof at passers-by

That's a big thumbs up from Wilson, if he had thumbs.

End of dog part, beginning of human part: There's lots of SCIENCE on the tub and on the website, and despite a SCIENCE background, I'm not exactly sure what "a source of highly purified, exposed, and preserved beta 1,3/1,6 glucans produced from a specially-selected strain of the yeast Saccharomyces cerevisiae" is all about, apart from "Yeasty stuff. It's healthy", and who am I to argue? Brown's claim health benefits, and seeing as we've been given a metric shedload of the stuff, time will be the judge of that. It's not the most premium of complete pet foods on the market (because some people pay stupid amounts of coin to feed their canines), but Banana Nose likes it, and that makes a change, to be honest.

Better finish reading this book, then. A man has been killed to death through the medium of an arrow up the bum while sitting on the toilet. Proper page-turner.

Small... Far away. Small... Far away.