Monday, July 14, 2003

”Welcome to Royston Vasey”

The longer I live here, the more I suspect I am trapped on the set of The League of Gentlemen. It’s not as if life here is abnormal per se, it’s the little details that make you think everything is not quite as it seems.

For example, I am represented on the local council by Roy “Chubby” Brown, and if that weren’t already enough, there’s this little old fella who stands by the entrance to the beach asking all-comers “Are you local?” And God help you if you’re not.

But there was one final thing that tipped me over the edge. It was Scaryduck Jr’s school fete this weekend. All very nice, the sun shone, we won a jar of pasta on the tombola and there was the obligatory display of Tae-Kwondo. It was nice to see local businesses getting involved too, but that’s where my head was well and truly messed with. The bouncy castle, and I kid you not, was sponsored by the local funeral home. Unlucky for them, hardly anybody got killed.

Oh yes, the sign saying “Welcome to Wyke Regis, You’ll never leave” is a bit of a giveaway as well.

The Scaryduck Archive

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