Tuesday, December 09, 2003

Letters to the Editor

Sir -

Once again I read in my morning edition of the Daily Fascist (a fine publication, though a tad too left-leaning for my liking), that our taxes are being wasted on uneducated lesbians, single parents and our Commonwealth bretheren, squandering our hard-earned money on “support groups”, “advice centres” and “food”.

What about us pensioners? We here at the Napoleon Bonaparte Secure Unit are of one mind (or three at the very least) that we are SICK and TIRED of it, and I was only saying to Lord Fanshawe-Nobling over foix gras and a fine champagne what a rough deal we OAPs get these days.

Instead of this so-called War on Terror, perhaps Mr Blair should be fighting the enemy within - single parents, the workshy, those who went to comprehensive schools and anyone who cannot prove Aryan descent for five generations.

Round them up, I say! Kill them and sell their carcases to the French as horsemeat, they’d be none the wiser. Maybe then, and if they allow me to use a crayon, I may consider voting for Mr Blair and his shower.

I am not mad.

Yours etc,

Lt Col Winston St John Cholmondeley-Cholmondeley Patel (Mrs)


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