The Best Person Ever
After the raging success of the Worst Person Ever Awards, we thought we should balance the whole thing up with a vote for the Bestest Person, Ever. Obviously, once the whole thing is settled, we’d like them all to go head-to-head in a battle to the death to settle the whole good-vs-evil thing for once and for all.
Here’s a few suggestions:
Jesus Christ. Despite dying horribly two thousand years ago, there are those who say he’s still with us doing good deeds an’ all that. Hardly his fault, though, that people have taken his whole “Love thy Neighbour” message the wrong way, resulting in endless wars and the slaughter of millions. And it’s undoubtedly tough to find out your name’s a cuss-word as well. Let’s hear it for the excellent J.Christ, still appearing on people's toast to this day!*
Or I could just cop out and go for Ian Botham. A God amongst men. That may be a bat of finest English willow in his hand, but it may as well be Excalibur. Truly excellent, apart all them drugs he did.
* Also, I am certain that he'd give P. Collins a righteous kicking.