And I put it to you, thussly:Angelina Jolie - she's a bit crap, isn't she?
Let me examine the evidence:
* Two Lara Croft movies (pants)
* Alexander, possibly the worst miscasting in cinema history, where Ms Jolie (aged 29) "played" the role of Alexander the Great's mother. Alexander was played by Colin Farrell (aged 28), and Jolie's role allowed her to mope around with some snakes, mug at the camera and change her accent throughout the film, until she eventually sounds Welsh.
She trades on just two things: Those enormous lips and her …ah, OK four things. There's got to be more than freakish eye candy, though.
Messrs Gaiman and Zemeckis seem to have the right idea for the forthcoming Image Capture version of the Norse classic Beowulf, though: dressing Ms Jolie up in a skin-tight rubber suit adding costume and background electronically later.
I shall repeat: dressing Angelina Jolie up in a skin-tight rubber suit. This is why Neil Gaiman is certainly the most excellent man on the planet. He gets to do things that we mere mortals can only dream of, mostly involving skin-tight rubber suits.
There is, of course a downside: Anthony Hopkins in a skin-tight rubber suit. Ewww.
And the nub of this argument. Am I right? Has fish-lipped A. Jolie flown in from the Planet Terrible, or do computer enchanced norkery really save the day? Who can tell?
So: Is there any other conventional wisdom that needs a right old challenging and fresh rubber-wear?
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