Return to the 419 Project: Update
This month, I am mostly totting up the genuine not-made-up-at-all cash money I am being offered by fine, upstanding Nigerian businessmen in my e-mail inbox, to see how much richer I might be if they all came good on their promises, which, of course, they will.
Total money "resting" in offshore accounts at the halfway point in my survey: 367,449,419 pounds.
If I wasn't already the luckiest man alive, I am also keeping a count of all the e-mail lottery winnings I'm getting from our fine EU friends in the Netherlands as part of Dutch E-mail Bastard Month.
So, I'm fully expecting Dale Winton to turn up at my front door at any minute with a camera crew and one of those oversized cheques to the tune of 63,387,151 pounds.
Winton, you're well late, you orange-skinned freak.
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