Friday, May 06, 2011

On Dining Like Kings

On Dining Like Kings

I'll be the first to admit that I've not been a lucky man in my life. After all, I bet winners like Charlie Sheen have never had to crap in their shed.

But, my luck turned last week when I won a packet of six Bernard Matthews Turkey Drummers in a competition.

And, by "winning", I mean "shining a torch through the scratchcard they give you at the till in Iceland to find the winning combination, what possible karmic retribution could a man expect from what might be construed as cheating in order to win a pound's worth of processed Turkey products?"

Not much of a victory against The Man, but that night, we DINED LIKE KINGS.


And due to the lack of facilities, we were BANISHED TO THE SHED LIKE KINGS.

It's tough work being a King. I don't think I'll bother applying for the job next time there's a vacancy.

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