Hello. I am Scaryduck Junior and I am excellent. My old Dad - who is a complete CHEESE - has foolishly let me come onto his blog to show how excellent I really am.
This excellent: About nine excellents out of ten.
I saw the other day that SCIENCE has come up with yet another excuse for larger people being bloaters. All I can say - from my top secret underground lab and bakery - is this: What a load of rubbish.
It's easy to see why people put on weight. You see, they aren't fat, it's:
a) big bonesWhen we all know that it is really:
b) water retention
c) a virus
d) me glands
g) all of a), b), c), d), e) and f)
h) pieActually, when you come to think about it, perhaps we're being a little harsh on the differently gravitationally-affected of our society.
Pie-lovers have feelings too.
No – hang on. That's 'fillings'.