Just your regular everyday hero, ma'am
Hooray for me! I just saved our hamster (the evil-hearted Ryan Minogue) from dying from hypothermia after he'd been left out in the shed for too long.
The poor little fella had been shunted out of the house for the summer while building site chaos ensued indoors. Then it turned cold, and I was presented with what appeared to be a furry little golf ball.
I had to warm up his fluffy little body by sticking him in a tube up my ar...err... blowing on him until he came to.
And then the little turd bit my finger because I'd woken him out of hibernation. Serves me right for feeding him after midnight.
I am utterly pissed off with the whole affair, as it happens.
I was rather looking forward to a good viking funeral.