On having a bad day at PC World
"Will we be getting a Thesaurus with this thing?"
"Does it bite? Oh-ho!"
"No, really. Will our word processor package be supplied with or without a Thesaurus?"
"Bloody Hell's teeth. What are you trying to sell me? If I got this thing home and found it didn't have a Thesaurus, there'd be a riot. And a violent assembly. Not to mention an angry demonstration. An uprising. An insurrection. And a heated disturbance."
"Are you sure, sir? It wasn't in your original order / instruction / bid / request."
"Mark my words – somebody could end up killed TO DEATH / slaughtered / slain / assassinated / stoved over the head with a pickaxe handle and dumped in a tin bath of quicklime behind the industrial estate over this"
"Are you sure you really need that Thesaurus, sir?"
"Come to mention it – no."
"Deal. Five hundred quid."
"You're having a laugh / chuckle / snigger / hoot."