I've got a new guilty pleasure. It's switching to virtually any music TV channel and watching their countdown of (and the name never varies) Top Twenty Bump'n'Grind R'n'B classics. Because that's all they ever show these days.
Some of these
programmes are called [Latest Reality TV star]'s Top Twenty Bump'n'Grind
R'n'B classics, because even reality TV stars have opinions, right?
identikit videos of gold-encrusted R'n'B performers singing their latest
song of sexual triumph, vocodered to Hell and back, whilst an army of
scantily-clad young ladies rotate in the background, foreground and
Then there are a
number of advertisements, followed by another stupendously expensive
video where a gold-encrusted R'n'B performer sings his latest song of
sexual triumph, accompanied in his struggle through life by an army of
scantily-clad, rotating young ladies.
videos are not set in a night club, and appear to take place in the back
of a TARDIS-like limo, or in a warehouse where a large party is taking
place, or on a beach which suddenly morphs into a night club party,
before the TARDIS-like limo turns up.
Some of the performers are now dead, or have convictions for beating their partners.
This post - in retrospect - marks the line where I am officially old.