Saturday, February 08, 2003

“An Apology”

The management wishes to apologise to our fellow diners in the staff restaurant for the spectacle we caused during supper last night. We pledge that these scenes of riotous behaviour will not happen again. Not until next time, anyway. Perhaps a full and frank explanation is in order.

We were discussing recent book purchases, and my boss Swiss Toni admitted that he was now the proud owner of Roger’s Profanisaurus which he had bought through Amazon (a snip at GBP 7.99). In an in-depth discussion of this work of literary genius, Swiss confessed that he didn’t know what “Rodeo Sex” is. So I told him.

Rodeo Sex, as I am sure you are all aware, is a derivation of the act of doggy-style coitus. Just as you reach the vinegar strokes, you say something along the lines of “Your sister likes it this way as well.” The challenge is to see how long you can stay on.

I am afraid to say that this revelation caused a certain amount of food to be spat out, and scenes of a boisterous nature which cannot be tolerated in polite society. We’d particularly like to pass on our apologies to Her Majesty, we’re pretty sure you’ll be able to get the gravy off your regalia, ma’am.

"How Rare!"

Not Scary. Not a duck.
A big thank you to the mighty cr0m at Weebl and Bob for this 100% realistic portrait of yours truly. You have to watch it. It does stuff. Blink and you’ll miss it. ARGH!


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