Songs for footballers. I repeat: Songs for footballers.
- Sympathy for the Nevilles - Rolling Stones (and for their old Dad, Bowie's Neville Neville)
- Pele all your love on me – Abba
- Kanu Feel the Force? - Real Thing
- Ashley Cole is a useless, money-grabbing, disloyal Chelsea cunt. Sorry – this isn't actually a song, I just had to get it out
- Roque Santa Cruz is coming to town – Jackson Five
- The Killing Roon – Echo and the Bunnymen
- Mama, George Weah all Crazee Now – Slade
- Bendtner out of Shape – Teardrop Explodes
- Wonderwalcott – Oasis
- I shot Paul Shirtliff (But I didn't shoot Ray Kennedy) – Bob Marley
- Living on Keown – Freddie Mercury
- I'm too Cesc-y – Right Said Fred
- Supermassive Joe Cole – Muse
- I kissed Keith Curle (and I liked it) – Katy Perry
- Life on Overmars – David Bowie
- (I don't want Brad) Friedel – Wham!
- The Man Who Sold Paul Scholes – David Bowie
- How Souness Now? – The Smiths
If you do not know any footballers (because, perhaps, you are a wet and a weed; or Welsh), I am willing to accept any sporting star. Get in!