On breaking the light-speed barrier
Congratulations must surely go to those white-coated boffins at CERN on their discovery of neutrinos that seemingly travel faster than the speed of light.
This - of course- blows all known physics completely out of the water, and opens the door for all sorts of possibilities, not least warp-speed travel that was once the realm of science fiction, and of course, the ability to travel in time.
Or DOES IT?
All that money spent by what we thought were some of the finest scientific minds on the planet, and for what?
They do realise they were beaten to it by Dr Emmett "Doc" Brown in 1985? And 1955. And 1885.
And all he had was a De Lorean, a shed and a direct line to Colonel Gaddafi.
The fucking wasters.
OK, CERN with your faster-than-light physics. Where are the jet packs and monkey butlers you promised us?
And flying cars.
And if you say "they're all travelling faster than light so you can't see them," I will NOT believe you.
Monkey butler. NOW.