Tory cuts have bitten us, and bitten HARD, and none more so than the Scaryduckworth-Lewis Method of Rating Things for Excellence list, the internet's number one at-a-glance table for rating things for excellence.This year's compare-and-contrast list, in which any product or concept may be compared to the relative merits of female celebrities has been pared to the bone, despite full support for the Scaryduckworth-Lewis Method of Rating Things for Excellence in the LibDem election manifesto. Hang your head, Clegg.
Also, I couldn't be arsed to think up the full twenty.
The Scaryduckworth-Lewis Method of Rating Things for Excellence: 2012 Edition
1. THATCHER, probablyLet's hear it for Will's Hot Mum from The Inbetweeners!
2 - 9. Fill in the blanks yourselves
10. Lovely, lovely Maggie Philbin. The perfectly-formed yardstick from which all female beauty and character should be measured
11 - 19. Fill in the blanks yourselves
20. Will's Hot Mum from The Inbetweeners
3 comments:
No. Where is the majesty of the previous years efforts? The alliteration, the prose, the vivid word imagery. We need more like this gem from 2008
"18. Billie Piper riding a space-hopper down a cobbled street"
or, from 2011
"19. Countdown's Rachel Riley looking up swears with a lightly-oiled Susie Dent in Dictionary Corner"
Now, go back and do it again.
The 2012 edition would have scored a "Margaret Thatcher in a skin tight peephole rubber gimp costume, sporting a whip and a USG belt of MBC sized butt plugs, but not lubricant." however the very mention of Maggie Philbin raises it to a number 2 (a number which is held in the highest regard in this blog, it seems), poor dead Heather Trott riding a transparent space hopper naked down a cobbled street.
Belinda Stewart-Wilson.
Absolutely, 100%, yes.
That is all.
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