Friday, October 24, 2003

Others Like Me

Found at last: people more mental than myself. B3ta is asking for stories of the most evil prank you’ve ever played, and there are acts in this thread that would never even have crossed my mind as a callow youth, such is the mixture wanton cruelty and drink-fuelled stupidity. For example, planet115 confesses:

Take one tube of smarties with a few left in, insert live wasp, leave on prominent display. It works brilliantly, with the unexpected bonus that people usually shake the tube to see if there's any inside -- the wasp *hates* that. Note, unless you have Bruce Lee-esque coordination and reaction speed, don't try to trap the wasp using the smartie container itself -- catch it in a glass or something and tip it in. This was a schooltime favourite, with pretty good results, until somebody realised that if the victim poured the sweets straight in their mouth they might actually die.

A lot of these sound like they’ve come striaght from the spiffy Playground Law site of which a certain genial Harry Grout of this parish has been a semi-regular contributor.

At this point, I am not permitted to mention a close relative of mine, rather aggrieved at her boyfriend's not-too-touching birthday present (the confession that he was shagging half the female staff of the supermarket in which he was the manager), sewed an entire packet of Captain Birdseye's finest fish fingers into his brand new three piece suite while he was out having a knee-trembler with the girl from frozen veg. None the wiser, he gave the fishy furniture to his mum.

But I never told you, right?

No Hands Kitten: The truth at last.

The Scaryduck Archive

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