That time of the week again. Votez-vous for tomorrow's Scary Story from my ever dwindling list of completed tales. Due to increased sunspot activity and the close attentions of Hello! magazine, the descriptions of said tales may not be one hundred per cent accurate.
* An Inspector Calls: In which Dog-rimming is accepted as an Olympic sport
* Blarney: Her name was Lola, and she collected stamps
* Paul: Or, Madagascar on a shoestring.
* Gym of Doom: "Ach!" said Vladimir, "It tastes like rotten fish!"
* The Raspberry Club: On doctor's orders, I took to wearing a rubber band around them; it didn't help, the cravings were still there.
Choose-o! If you dare.
Oooh - if you've promised to send me money for a t-shirt, please get the ackers to me soonest. Thankyouverymuch, uh-huh-huh.