"Where are we going tomorrow?" I ask, the weather forecasters telling us it will be a reasonably pleasant day, "I thought we could go to World of Birds."
World of Birds is nearby, and may be - oh-ho! - "cheep". So, we look it up on the internet.
"Oh," says my beloved, "it looks like it's £14 to get in. Each."
"Fourteen of the Queen's Pounds?!" I say, incredulous, "Fourteen Pounds? Each? I'd fully expect to be able to punch an owl for that money. Punch it until an egg came out."
"And it looks like owl-punching-until-an-egg-comes-out is an extra twenty notes."
"The bloody crooks. Any online reviews of this place?"
She looks. She nods. She reads.
"Yeah... it turns out they're not even owls. Just chickens in owl masks."
"The bastards."
We do not go to World of Birds.
11 comments:
I'm sorry, but I would happily pay anything up to £14 to stroke that owl in the picture.
Beloved!
You have a new beloved?
Very subtle introduction Mr Duck........
Anon: Yes. Yes I do. We have a shared interest, viz: owl punching
you'll need more than just one shared interest Sir.
see if she's into something really fun, like shooting spitballs at random police officers, or combing through rubbish tips for other people's personal correspondence, or nostril hair collecting.
Owls don't have arses. Fact, that is. No gay owls.
Why go to World of Birds?
You have a new one.
His beloved is actually Julian Meteor.
did you mean birdworld of Farnham? Tis very good, no owl punch when I went, but they did have a long island iced penguin.
Manageress at Leopard'U'Like Warehouse. Another common interest.
[still reeling from the fact that Scary has a girlyfriend]
What about Owl Stretching Time? How much is that?
[q.v. owl arse comment above]
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