...to this whole MPs' expenses fiasco, it's the fact that not a single politician of any colour has come to my door for the entire European election campaign.
Granted, I saw a UKIP coming up my front path, but by the time I'd retrieved my largest net, the man-trap and the length of rubber hose with the nails through the end from out of the shed, he had made a run for it.
Still, his leaflet made refreshing reading: "Vote UKIP - just a evil as all the others. Combined."
This year, I shall be mainly placing my vote - after disqualifying all the lunatics and racist BNP turds - through the proven scientific method of "Ip Dip Dog Shit". Can't be any worse than the jokers we've got now, and there's something to be said for random politics.
Ah, that's it: It's shite.
Edited two days later for grocer's apostrophe badness. Will now turn my length of rubber hose with the nails through the end on myself out of shame.
16 comments:
first for crappy politicians. In the words of Billy Connelly, "don't vote. It just encourages them."
"largest net, the man-trap and the length of rubber hose with the nails through the end from out of the shed"
I'm interested...Do go on!
Dear Signior Duck,
I was sick inna hedge last night. It did not go 'yaaaaarch' but rather 'flobble'. It was, however, rich and brown. Naturally I found it incumbent upon myself to inform you of this discrepancy.
Warmest Regards,
Rat
I've been similarly disappointed here in Crewe, especially as the Nazis were meant to be targeting the North West and I could really do with a good ruck. Scarysister lives nearby doesn't she. Has she had any doings with them?
The only people I've had round are the Tories. Twice. As if I wasn't abusive enough to them the first time. Bring on the BNP I like to make stupid people look stupid.
The one thing that's true from culture to culture, nation to nation - policitians are jokers.
jokers = jerks?
;)
When my son was first born, a sweet old lady pinched his cheeks and said 'He'll grow up to be Prime Minister of Australia, one day'.
I replied that I would rather any child of mine was honourable and well-liked.
We elect the opposition party to replace the old unpopular ruling party, until the new party becomes unpopular, and then vote in the previous unpopular party. Lather, rinse, repeat.
... and the voters call the politicians stupid!
p.s. Jake - good luck with your 'flobble'.
Doesn't matter who you vote for.
The politicians always get in.
I was a touch naughty with the recent vote that we had here - Mr Pseudonymph wasn't going to vote the way I wanted him to, so I told him it wasn't compulsory as it was only a referendum.
We won, but the politician who wasted all the money on the referendum won't have to pay it back.
We never get any politicians around here. Mind you the local Ratepayers party always wins the council elections as they will fight to the death for our small town and have no national aspirations. This explaisn why we are the only little Warwickshire town with a navy, space program and independant nuclear deterant. Let's see the people from Rugby bring it on now !
I have decided.
The speaker of the house of commons should now be Brian Blessed. His is the only voice I know that could control the unworthy and unruly bunch. With the added bonus that whenever the Prime Minister wins a vote and the result is announced, it will be followed by a cry of "Gordon's ALIVE!"
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