The Homeopathic James Bond Gag What I Wrote
Homeopathic secret agent James Bond walks into a bar after a hard day killing Her Majesty's enemies completely TO DEATH.
"Good evening, sir" says the attractive young woman behind the bar, already slipping out of her clothes in damp anticipation, "My name's Randy. Randy Orgasms. How may I be of... service?"
Bond raises an eyebrow, used to such forward behaviour from the female of the species in his long, hard years in the Service. But tonight, he is on duty, evil is at large in this very establishment.
"I'll have a homeopathic Vodka Martini, if you would be so kind."
"How, " she asks, her voice laden with innuendo, "would sir like it?"
"Diluted, shaken but not stirred, diluted, shaken but not stirred, diluted, shaken but not stirred, diluted, shaken but not stirred, diluted, shaken but not stirred, diluted, shaken but not stirred, diluted, shaken but not stirred, diluted, shaken but not stirred, diluted, shaken but not stirred, diluted, shaken but not stirred, diluted, shaken but not stirred, diluted, shaken but not stirred, diluted, shaken but not stirred, diluted, shaken but not stirred, diluted, shaken but not stirred, please."
Bond slept alone.
13 comments:
First, First, and dare I say First again.
What is this vokda of which you speak?
Second. Can we have this blog diluted and shaken and diluted and shaken and ...
See also: Vodak
I thought that a homeopathic James Bond joke would hardly contain any Jamesey Bondsey bits.
Real is scientific homeopathy. Small doses of evidence-based modern homeopathy medicine brings big results for everyone
Yoda? Is that you?
Malik: Now, about this evidence. Care to share it with the BMJ? Thought not.
Scary, I think what Malik is referring to is the acknowledged fact that people who take the magic pills are less likely to trouble the NHS for expensive traditional treatments until it's way too late.
Am now going to watch the football on the flat thing in the corner that doesn't appear to be CONNECTED TO ANYTHING except AIR via a pointy thing on the roof. Fuck me, how does that work then?
Not Yoda. Voda. Without a K.
Next time:
Homeoerotic literature.
Hmmm... homeopathic porn. I volunteer to do the shaking.
"Bond slept alone."
And so should you, after that.
Poor The TFMD.
@TRT - Homeoerotic. I didn't know you swung both ways. Well I never.
Protest
http://www.homeopathyworldcommunity.com/forum/topics/save-homeopathy-protest-at
http://www.hmc21.org/
If you signed your petition and then photocopied it at 10% greyscale to dilute it, then repeated, and diluted and repeated and diluted etc. etc. then it would be an EVEN MORE POTENT petition.
Win.
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