"There's nothing worse," said the Fragrant Mrs Duck, "that you standing over me when I'm taking my make-up off."Can't I get ready for bed in peace?"
I harumph, the cogs turning over in my mind, there being LOADS of things worse than my standing over her whilst she is removing her make-up. Not that she needs telling, or anything.
"Having your face eaten by woodpeckers."
"What? WHAT?"
"Having your face eaten by woodpeckers. That's loads worse than my standing over you while you are removing your make-up. Not that you need telling, or anything.
"Or, getting run over by a steam roller driven by Gordon Brown, taking his awful revenge on the country for voting Conservative.
"Or, sea monsters rising from the fish pond, ripping out your innards for a skipping rope and getting wet footprints on the hall carpet.
"Or, angry geese.
"Or..."
"Shut up. And stop standing over me."
9 comments:
Insomniac furst!
Having non-specific, shooting pain in your back in the middle of the night. That is worse, I can tell you for nothing...
Well you shouldn't have been wearing her make-up anyway, so sit down and let her take it off.
Turd.
Nothing worse than a blog that used to do Vote-o and tales of mirth and woe which then lost its way ...
Not a fan of angry geese, myself.
Can you get "angry geese" flavoured Ringos?
Now, now. You must allow us laydees our privacy whilst we work our magic. Or un-work it, as the case may be.
Having someone watch you take off the slap is like having someone watch you when you're on the lavvy.
Donna: you can charge for that. It's a niche market but a lucrative one.
Tzonar.
The way I feel about my job just now, if I knew where to go for an interview I'd do it.
Might as well make money out of being pissed off eh?
NOT pissed on you notice. Draw the line at that.
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