Wednesday, December 08, 2010

I am not mad book reviews

On asking why you - YES, YOU - haven't bought my excellent book

The reviews for my EXCELLENT book are in from some of the world's leading special publications, and by-and-large, they're pretty positive. See what you think, and then BUY MY EXCELLENT BOOK:

- "Couldn't put this book down" - Superglue Enthusiast

- "Shat myself laughing" - Dysentery Victims Association Newsletter

- "This book saved my life" - People Who Make Armour Out of Books Weekly

- "We quite like I Am Not Mad. Just the right thickness" - Wonky Table Owner

- "The ideal toilet companion" - Toilet & Crapping Magazine

- "LOL" - Pyongyang's Rodung Sinmun (Official newspaper of the Central Committee of the Workers' Party of Korea)

Of course, I'm not a complete Lord Sugar, only posting the reviews that praise me to they skies. There are people out there who would have me as an enemy, and their views (utterly crap and WRONG as they are) should be equally valid : These negative reviews are …err… like water off a duck's back:

- "Do not buy this book" - Anatadaephobe News

- "We are sickened - SICKENED - by the clear prejudice in this so-called book" - Quarterly Journal of the British Wasp Owner's Association

- "FINISH HIM" - Which Fatwa? Monthly

You too could be the owner of this magnificent heirloom piece. "The ideal gift for a rich, elderly relative with a dodgy heart" - Insurance Fraudster Today

17 comments:

Pseudonymph said...

I have, indeed, joined the club.

snee said...

Ah, now the sudoku game's batteries have run out, this could be the perfect replacement for those peaceful moments in the loo - probably help with any constipation too...

Erin said...

@snee: the Dysentery Victims Association Newsletter might be better for that.

If I had actual, real money I would definitely buy this book. How's that?

Anonymous said...

"... why you - YES, YOU - haven't bought my excellent book..."

Could this be why?

"... < http://scaryduck.blogspot.com/%3Cbr%20/%3Ehttp://www.lulu.com/product/paperback/i-am-not-mad/13661295 > ..."
(obviously this is not the right medium for publishing HTML source)

-->

"Sorry, the page you were looking for in the blog Scaryduck: Not Scary. Not a Duck. does not exist."

Too much scaryduck blogspot.com a bad thing for once.
/df

Akheloios said...

Fine Duck, fine, I'll buy your damn book, but I promise you that I will refuse to enjoy it.

Merry xmas to you and to the fragrant Mrs. Duck and Ducklings.

Sigg3 said...

Yer linkses are FAIL!

Pseudonymph said...

It appears I have a Real Life copy on my desk here, but Lulu have just sent an email to let me know that they dispatched it yesterday. Is it in episode form like Harry Potter?

Sigg3 said...

Right. I just ordered the REAL LIFE COPY to find out on the ORDER CONFIRMATION that it's 344 pages!

How the fridge am I supposed to get through 344 pages!??

Luckily, am cheap and order regular mail shipping. Let's wait and see what the British mail service can do..

grayacre said...

Kindle format?

TRT said...

Kindling, I reckon.

Scaryduck said...

Link FAIL: Have fixed. Soz.

Scaryduck said...

Also: KINDLE - working on it.

Anonymous said...

A mime told me not to.

WrathofDawn said...

Because I am caught in a Mercury in retrograde* miasma of cock-uppery the like I have never seen. Will order a copy when (and if) this madness slows the f**k down.

*not that I believe in that crap, but it's either that or Murphy's Law

Lord Andrew of Goulding said...

I've read it but it's not as good as the film!

Tired Dad said...

"Would not buy this book if my life depended upon it" - Tired Dad

Scaryduck said...

Fuck me - my Arch Nemesis Tired Dad is back!

Are you still tired?