On deep philosophical inquiry. And arsing about

On deep philosophical inquiry. And arsing about

Poor dead Thomas Edison once said: "Genius is 1% inspiration and 99% perspiration", and he should know having won medals for his prodigious sweating throughout his lifespan.

He obviously did not have access to the internet, for these days the saying would be: "Genius is 0.1% inspiration, 0% perspiration and 99.9% arsing about on Twitter".

Yeah, our atheist pals point out that blind faith in an invisible sky zombie, his lucky story book and a bunch of blokes in funny hats who knew larger blokes armed with swords and easy access to kindling led to much the same result. For eg: Centuries of arsing about and nothing getting done.

What did lack of scientific advancement give us? The plague, that's what. And bald blokes who were really, really good at drawing capital letters.

We're over that now, and by rights we ought to have all the monkey butlers we can eat.

So: Where's my monkey butler?

I'll tell you where. Nowhere. And that's because all the monkey butler scientists are arsing about on Twitter thinking up #toiletsitcoms or #insertthewordbuttocksintomovietitles instead of working on monkey butler technology.

We cannot let our civilisation fail now that we've come this close to the Holy Grail of Simian Domestic Help.

Twitter MUST BE STOPPED.