Thursday, August 26, 2010

On not winning a holiday in Kenya

On not winning a holiday in Kenya

"Win a tea-tasting holiday in Kenya!" screams the side of the box of PG Tips tea-bags in my kitchen.

"Using your skill and judgement," Munkeh says, "Tell us what you think your taste-buds are telling you and you could be on your way to Kenya for the holiday of a lifetime!"

Peasy, but they haven't left much room on the entry form, so "I think PG Tips tastes like month-dead tramp juice pured through James Corden's Y-Front gusset and blended with the tormented souls of the damned" is totally out, as is "I think PG Tips tastes like Ken Dodd's dad's dog, which is incidentally, dead."

So, I've thought long and hard about this and my winning entry is this:

"I think PG Tips tastes like Your Mum"

I can taste those elephant steaks already.

12 comments:

Pseudonymph said...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_xwoucDNCT4

Debster said...

Dammit second.

Scaryduck said...

Pseudonymph: Congratulations, you win an internet

Pseudonymph said...

Excellent. I broke the last one on Tuesday. Props to Snee, Mr Pavlov's Cat, and TRT for fixing it for me.

Lord Andrew of Goulding said...

I hope they get Cheryl Cole to say:
"PG Tips tastes like Your Mum" to Simon Cowell on the X Factor set .

Erin said...

You must *really* want to visit Kenya.

TRT said...

Only in Kenya...
http://www.weebls-stuff.com/songs/kenya/

I saw Johnny Vegas buying birthday cards with his son in Paperchase at a main London terminus a few weeks ago. So I guess I'm not eligible to enter.

But if I did enter, it'd be "I think PG Tips tastes like boiled monkey spank." because I really didn't think much of their new monkey shaped t-bag design, as pictured on your 'blog.

TRT said...

Also: Holiday of a lifetime? Never again. (c) Tim Vine.
http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-scotland-edinburgh-east-fife-11058852

Andrew Waddington said...

So what tea do you like ?

WrathofDawn said...

It's not on, Monkeh.

Patmos Pete said...

The third message from heaven...
If any man worship the beast and his image, and receive his mark in his forehead, or in his hand, The same shall drink of the wine of the wrath of God, which is poured out without mixture into the cup of his indignation; and he shall be tormented with fire and brimstone in the presence of the holy angels, and in the presence of the Lamb: And the smoke of their torment ascendeth up for ever and ever: and they have no rest day nor night, who worship the beast and his image, and whosoever receiveth the mark of his name.

TRT said...

And that's the taste of PG Tips, is it? That probably explains why I prefer Tetley.