HOMEOPATHIC DIET

HOMEOPATHIC DIET

The Diet industry.

Billions of pounds spent every year by people in the hope that it's the magic cure to losing weight. A magic cure when all they really want is to eat less and walk to the corner shop.

But in this results-led society, people want to see instant results, and when the weight doesn't fall off the second they've popped a pill and spent ten of the most boring minutes on their life on a piece of torture equipment they've bought off a TV Shopping channel, they soon go back to the cake.

Billions of pounds. Wasted. And I want some of that sweet, sweet money.

So. Back to basic. People want to pay genuine cash money for a quick fix for their huge wobbling arse problem, and what they really want to do is eat less. A lot less.

I can do that.

And taking the tried-and-tested concept of "What doesn't kill me makes me strong", it should be pointed out that I have never once been killed by a chip sandwich and a cream cake.

Especially not the cake. No-one, as far as I know, has every been killed in a cake-related accident.

If we take cake, dilute it and shake it, dilute it and shake it, dilute it and shake it, dilute it and shake it, dilute it and shake it, dilute it and shake it, dilute it and shake it, dilute it and shake it, dilute it and shake it, dilute it and shake it, dilute it and shake it, dilute it and shake it and put it on a sugar pill, we end up with HOMEOPATHIC CAKE.

HOMEOPATHIC CAKE which is the ideal diet solution for today's slimmer-in-a-hurry-with-far-too-much-money-to-burn.

Yeah, genius. Don't tell me.

"Ha ha!" I hear you say, "How are people who want to lose weight going to shed the pounds when they're guzzling homeopathic cake on a sugar pill that's made out of actual sugar? Get out of THAT, clever trousers."

To which I say: Nutra-Sweet.

This time next year, Rodders....