"ICELAND," said the sign on the side of a lorry owned by Britain's third skankiest supermarket parked in a layby just outside Dorchester."ICELAND - Because mums are heroes"
It's "heroines", you twats. Heroines.
Although, I can see their point. They've come up with a marvellous advertising slogan, that sounds great, and looks passable painted on the side of lorries, even when parked up in Dorset's premier transvestite dogging site.
But say it out loud, and it comes out like this: "ICELAND - Because mums take heroin", which is hardly the image that Britain's third skankiest supermarket chain wants to project, especially after that nasty business with Kerry Katona and the Bolivian Marching Powder.
Or maybe it is? Do they really want drug-addled mums staggering around the aisles, fighting over the £1 per dozen pizzas and begging passers-by for the price of a chicken tikka lasagne?
I would happily abandon my local Asda if that's the kind of thing that awaits me at Britain's third skankiest supermarket chain. In fact, I shall write to Iceland THIS MINUTE to ensure that this is the case.
It's not as though supply's a problem. After all, the people behind this monstrosity were clearly not on the same plane as the rest of us:
KIDS: Just say no.
11 comments:
'Do they really want drug-addled mums staggering around the aisles, fighting over the £1 per dozen pizzas and begging passers-by for the price of a chicken tikka lasagne?'
And *that* in a nutshell** is an average day at work.
**or nutcase, as it may be.
Yep, sounds like my work too.
It's like watching the medical equivalent to "Bum Fights"*
*Bum as in Down-and-out.
@ Donna 'If I pay for my methadone, I can't afford my ciggies...'
Yeah. Philip Morris Company really needs the money more than a small businessman. You go right ahead.
I couldn't get into Iceland last year because of the volcanic emissions from the tramp in the door way.
I'm not really in the mood for a 50piece prawn platter.
Now THIS is the kind of quality post that made scaryduck the Guardian's Blog of the World, or whatever the accolade was that got me here in the first place.
"chicken tikka lasagne" - Inspired!
PS - I'd like to think that was the case, at any rate.
I actually went to Iceland this afternoon, and YES, Chicken Tikka Lasagne actually exists.
BUT! I am now a convert because a) I didn't meet Katona, and b) my dinner is tasty gorgeous.
Iceland, everybody! Let's hear it for Bjork!
Unhand the prawns, knave. They're MINE.
@Alistair: "I actually went to Iceland this afternoon, and YES, Chicken Tikka Lasagne actually exists."
No?! Why were you atr Iceland, you skanky whore?
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