We are living in hard times. And, to be honest, I'm not quite sure how to handle the cuts being imposed upon us to slash our country's deficit.
I've heard many arguments as to whether the cuts are actually necessary or not, and I'm just grateful still to be in a job whilst others have - very sadly - found themselves out of the door.
And the big problem is this: Gideon "George" Osborne.
He's a millionaire product of a very expensive education, and, frankly, he's got that sort of face you can never tire of punching. That's no political bias, by the way, he's just got that sort of face you can never tire of punching.
He could be announcing the closure of every single primary school in the country and forcing 5-11 year-olds to labour down the mines "as a vital grounding in the world of voluntary work", and he'd still have that smirk on his face that you can never tire of punching.
This being the case, I propose a new law. And the new law is this: When announcing budget cuts for the good of the nation's finances, with a smirk on his face that you can never tire of punching, the Chancellor MUST finish his statement with the words: "By Grabthar's hammer - What a savings".
Then we'd know he's sincere, and not secretly laughing up his sleeve at us.
I shall write to my millionaire, Eton educated quadruple-barrelled-surnamed MP immediately.