Good grief, I am informed that at least one British supermarket sells Fish Finger sandwiches - proper man cuisine that cannot be sold in mere packets.In selling these sacred bloke products, Asda have over-stepped the mark from the Bloke Kitchen Arts to BLASPHEMY.
This on the back of breakfast cereals being sold in bowl-sized portions with a plastic spoon and a splash of milk. And let us not forget pre-mashed mash.
WRONGNESS, which leaves all blokes with a certain level of culinary skill (Level One Geezer) at danger of forgetting how to cook at all.
And God help us, then, if there is a war.
What next in this new line of products for people too lazy to look after themselves?
Aunt Bessie's Lumps of Burned Cheese from the Bottom of the Grill Pan?
Findus Pre-chewed steak?
Hovis ready-buttered sliced bread (extra-thick-sliced only)?
Birds Eye Turd-in-a-box (Save valuable bloke time eating, just flush down the toilet)
Mankind: It is doomed
Womankind: As you were, nothing to see here
14 comments:
Or: CHOKLIT that you just apply directly to your hips.
Mmmm. CHOKLIT.
Aw, this was a really great post. In theory I'd like to write like this also - taking time and real effort to make a good article... but what can I say... I procrastinate a lot and never seem to get something done.
Don't do yourself down. You seem pretty good at spamming.
You forgot lovely spam.
WoD
Ah, Spam. The wonder food. It was on the essential ingredients list for Delia's hastily retitled and re-edited book, "I'm not f***ing cooking for you, you ignorant tw*t! Sort your own bl***y dinner out - I'm going out and don't expect me back anytime soon."
I think the Level 1 Geezer has already forgotten to cook.
And mmmm CHOKLIT - never goes out of style!
You missed a buisiness oppertunity there, Turd-inna-box,
This time next year.........
I see Nescafe have launched a 3 in 1 mega time saver - Coffee, milk and sugar all in one sachet.
For the love of christ.
What next. Hot Noodle! That's Pot Noodle with the hot water already added. Ok it'll be cold by the time it gets to the supermarket shelf but you can always eat it ambient temperature. Nom, nom, nom!
Believe it or not, ready buttered sliced bread HAS been available for around 15 years. Admittedly the Soreen Fruit Loaf, but still ...
I see Nescafe have launched a 3 in 1 mega time saver - Coffee, milk and sugar all in one sachet.
We all know how that'll turn out: for eg, Scout Hut Coffee
It all went downhill when they put sausage, egg and beans in the same tin. That used to be gourmet cooking for a man, and involved making dirty every pan, spoon and surface of a kitchen.
Now it's just one-pot cooking!
"I see Nescafe have launched a 3 in 1 mega time saver - Coffee, milk and sugar all in one sachet."
Where've you been, Edwin? These things have been out for 154 years!
try this website
www.thefishfingersandwichbook.com
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