Is it just me – or don't you see tramps these days?You know – proper tramps. Gentlemen of the road, badgering you for the price of a portion of chips and a flagon of the finest freshly-pressed scrumpy, living like kings of the road in cardboard palaces under the railway arches of our towns and cities.
Characters to a man, a far cry from the modern wino who is virtually indistinguishable from market-stall tracksuit-clad binge-drinking chav.
Their own way of life. Their own secret signals. Their own private haunts in the unwanted, crumbling quarters of town, huddled round camp fires, sharing their tales of the road.
A dying breed – where are they now?
In other news: God, it there ANOTHER kebab shop opening in town? You've got to love that smoky, cider-marinated taste of a large doner and chips.
Actually – that's not a bad idea. I hope nobody's got in before me.
20 comments:
First!
BTW, organ-donor kebab link-ski not working.
Second! We have a tramp around here. Which is surprising, as it's relatively effluent. He walks up and down the highway with a wheelbarrow, collecting bits and pieces. He has an appreciation society on Facebook, wherein people give him new sneakers for his constant walking. He is an icon.
BTW, organ-donor kebab link-ski not working.
Turd for kebabs
Fourth for tramps. They make the divorce lawyers go round.
BTW, organ-donor kebab link-ski not working.
Hey! I got a fag end in my kebab.
p.s. organ-donor kebab link-ski not working
They can take Catherine Tate if they run out of tramps.
"I pitta the fool..."
Mmmm, kebab. No. Too sober. Maybe later.
BTW, organ-donor kebab link-ski not working. Dodgy quotes. Should be:
http://news.sky.com/skynews/Home/World-News/Russia-Police-Have-Arrested-Three-Homeless-Men-Suspected-Of-Killing-And-Eating-A-25-Year-Old-Male/Article/200911315453983?f=rss
Or:
http://www.reuters.com/article/oddlyEnoughNews/idUSTRE5AF4W320091116
I think I'll go for curry tonight instead.
If you want tramps I suggest you visit Bath...
You've set me wondering; the greatest concentration of kebab shops in Crewe is along West Street, natural home of "market-stall tracksuit-clad binge-drinking chav". Apparently cheaper than lamb.
@Pseudonumph - Effluent? You live in the by-product of a major industry? :)
Also, the tramps are out there. It's just that they're so outnumbered by the mentally ill, released to fend for themselves on the streets by Care-in-Community programs, they just don't stand out anymore.
Also: BTW, organ-donor kebab link-ski not working. No need. It's on the dole.
No, Richard, you should head further south to Nantwich road where, last time I looked, there were over 23 different take aways (minimum of 3 kebab shops) in less than a quarter of a mile..
This is true. But Derby Docks is nearer West St thus ensuring a ready supply of Staffordshire Bull Terriers.
Oh! I thought that sign was a simple misprint and was meant to say dodgy kebab shop, not doggy kebab shop.
I've not seen so many of them in Holland of late which is strange because I think there are more here than in Briton.
A greasy old bloke with a ferrety beard and a red, tennants extra slab of a face asked me for a shekel the other week in London. Old school, that boy was.
Where are they now?
I'll tell you. They're infesting the bus-stops and U-bahn stations of Cologne, that's where they are. To such a degree that the U-Bahn have been forced to hire security guards with big growly alsatians to go round and regularly throw them out.
All the tramps have migrated to the corner of the road near my office where they congregate on the seats for a few nips of 'Chateau Special Brew'. It's great fun, I get to watch tramp fights from the comfort of my seat and it gives our security guards something to do when one of the gentlemen of the road pisses in the shrubbery. It's a sight to behold when our head security guard rushes from the building wielding a broom and drives a half sozzled tramp with his tackle out along the road towards the old folks home.
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