Monday, November 30, 2009

On writing a letter to Top Gear

On writing a letter to Top Gear

Dear Top Gear

I couldn't help noticing that undertakers these days are getting to drive some really sporty-looking hearses. Like this:

Unfortunately, the poor saps in the funeral industry are limited to 5 mph and never get to have any fun in their pimped-up stiff-wagons with mega-bass sound systems and under-coffin lighting.

You should have a race. And when Hammond wipes out at a nose-bleed-erupting 27 mph, he'd oven-ready for the local crem.

Go on. DO IT. Today.

I am not mad.

Your pal, Albert O'Balsam

11 comments:

Audrey said...

Pole position!

Pseudonymph said...

Go crazy with the 37 brake hearsepower.

Donna said...

TURD

Speaking of which .......

Please promise that Big Bawbag Clarkson will be inna box in the back of Wee Hammonds hearse.

Ballast you understand when cornering.

Squeakypony said...

How would it go towing a caravan?

Debster said...

I am sure I have seen this done already.

Erin said...

Have him race a lawn mower. Or just send him the letter. You know you want to.

WrathofDawn said...

Oh for heaven's sake? What's the point of racing with a stiff in the back? Do it with a LIVE passenger for more screaming action.

Debster said...

Or one of those dead people that suddenly wakes up.

eiremurphy said...

Dawn/Debster - would you settle for a zombie passenger?

Lord Andrew of Goulding said...

Hmm, baked hamster - I'm feeling peckish.

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