I've been told my idiot letters of complaint are far too verbose. Straight to the point, then:
Dear Aldi,Actually, now I come to mention it, they get bigger the further you go down the packet...
Your so-called "Extra Large" peanuts appear to be the same size as normal peanuts. Explain yourselves, you curs, as to why they are not the size of a giraffe.
And no, "Wibbly-wobbly timey-wimey" does not a good explanation make.
Dear Aldi,Crap. That's two stamps wasted.
As you were.
Your newest best pal,