Wednesday, June 08, 2011

MAY CONTAIN TRACES OF NUTS

MAY CONTAIN TRACES OF NUTS


I've been told my idiot letters of complaint are far too verbose. Straight to the point, then:

Dear Aldi,

Your so-called "Extra Large" peanuts appear to be the same size as normal peanuts. Explain yourselves, you curs, as to why they are not the size of a giraffe.

And no, "Wibbly-wobbly timey-wimey" does not a good explanation make.

Your pal,

Albert O'Balsam
Actually, now I come to mention it, they get bigger the further you go down the packet...

Dear Aldi,

As you were.

Your newest best pal,

Albert O'Balsam
Crap. That's two stamps wasted.

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