Notes from the Forever Alone Aisle in the Supermarket
Head down, he runs up and down the aisles of the supermarket.
Own-brand Rola-Cola courisng through his veins, Manchester United shirt on his back, seven years of age and he has never felt so alive.
He's a racing car.
A rocket ship.
No, he's a jet fighter.
"Cornelius, watch where you're..."
Head first, right into my nuts.
My first, entirely natural reaction: "Oo-yagh!"
And my second, as I find myself bent double over the frozen pizzas, questioning the very meaning of life: "What kind of name is Cornelius?"
Sight returning to my eyes, I see the words that make everything better.
"Deep Pan Frozen Pizza. Buy One, Get One Free"